Today is Friday the 13th and while I'd say I'm not typically a superstitious person, I do notice that today I've sort of held my breath if you will.
Last evening marked 2 weeks of Danny being gone. It seems like there's no way it's been two weeks and at the same time it feels like it's certainly been longer than that. It seems like it was just yesterday I held him in my arms as he met our Maker and we planned his memorial service. And it feels like it's been a long time ago as the days have been filled with trying to get 36 hours of accomplishments crammed in to a 24 hour day.
I was hopeful for some pleasant dreams last night. What I got was a rapid rush of adrenaline as my fight or flight response was fully deployed when my dreams had me in some sort of horrific car crash. I woke up gasping as in "Oh no!" before impact. I remember shaking my head and thinking - "you crazy girl! Go back to sleep". And after the heart rate slowed back down I did just that. No more crazy dreams. Ha!
Today I finally am feeling like I'm getting a head of things. My goal for this week was to handle as much of the legalities as I could get accomplished. It's taken time and a group effort as I've relied bunches on my mom and Kori this week for helping with the kids and daily household chores. I remember laughing at myself earlier today thinking - I'm doomed next week when I try to fly completely solo. Hey if I can't laugh at myself, I'd be crying. It'll be an adventure...guaranteed.
The one thing I'm super proud of is that I've FINALLY gotten caught up on thank you notes. We have been so incredibly, abundantly (whatever other adjective you'd like to insert) blessed by an outpouring of support from our friends and family; some we don't know but Danny had impacted somehow. I'm roughly 330-ish notes in so far. It's been amazing! I am in complete awe. God has us covered and He's shown it over and over to us. There are days I should be just mouth gaping open dumbfounded, but at this point I just sort of shake my head and say - Yep. God's showing off today! - Makes me sort of think of the Popeye cartoon when Popeye is protecting Olive.
This afternoon I took the kids to see the movie Paddington. (super cute by the way) We followed that up with a search for new tennis shoes and some bigger pots for these amazing plants from the funeral that remind us of Daddy. A trip to Burlington for the Eversmeyers' isn't complete unless you hit Pancheros and Sassy Strawberry so we made good on that tradition as well. (Thanks Beth for letting Chase out for us!)
Today I feel like we were productive and we had a very enjoyable afternoon and evening. No catastrophes. No major melt downs. Only a few tough questions to answer and acknowledge about Daddy dying and being in heaven. So tonight as I'm sitting with these 3 angels as they fall to sleep, I'm thankful for our own specially trained Guardian Angel who is watching over us. And I breathe a sigh of relief that we've made it through another day of searching for our new normal.
We love and miss you every day Daddy!
No comments:
Post a Comment